Interestingly, I have had several conversations these past few weeks with clients whose visions are in the process of being built, who are ultra gifted, and who brought up how this journey is impacting their marriages.
For some, we may have come to a point where we realize that one of the reasons we may have not pursued our visions is fear about the relationship shift and how our starting to sparkle and shine may affect our partners. Have you self-sabotaged because you don’t have the tools to evolve your relationship with your vision? That is the exact conversation I had with one client recently. Not that our spouses have intentionally held us back, but that we have chosen to say to ourselves…
“I cannot really go for it with my vision because of how this could change things with me and my spouse. I don’t want my vision to draw me away. What if he doesn’t support me? What if I waste our money? What if it makes him feel bad somehow? What if ….?” ( fear, fear, fear)
Keep talking like that and you can kiss that next great chapter goodbye and as they say, “Die with the music left in you.” But really, is it your spouse that is stopping you? Or is it your own unwillingness to deal with your own fear and grow in the way you relate to him? Because let’s face it, my friend, when we women want something, we find a way to get it.
But trust me, I have done it too. I have allowed my insecurities about how I relate to my husband at times to be a convenient and very understandable excuse for my lack of growth and pursuit of my own vision. Now let me just say, I have learned I have to take responsibility for my own choices. Living your vision means up-leveling in many areas. And if this vision thing causes me to have to grow in my marriage – then that is a good thing!
I have received numerous emails and messages from very thankful husbands whose wives have taken LYV, because of the uplift in their marriage that occurred as well…a side benefit but a very nice one.
So before you go using your spouse as a reason to hold back, think again. Filling you up is one of the best things we could do for your marriage.
As I head into my 34th year of marriage to my high school sweetheart, I can honestly say we are having a very sweet time together now. I dare say one of the most romantic, fun, and deeply connected times ever. So it is possible to have a growing vision and a growing marriage at the same time. So let’s not use that little lie anymore. 😊
Much love and encouragement to shine brightly!
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